congratulations to the abuse which i face

Let depression dawn me
Let me with no feeling onshore
As I’m already below the waves,
Some daft reminder that no matter how loud my depression is
I’m mute to the world
Just like I’ve been told
From mouths and mouths and mouths
That I’m not worth
Anything

And let that thought
Consume
Repeat
Shake
Rattle

Until like in acid
I will dissolve
Just as silently

As the world wants.

-

I've never really dropped poetry, but it kind of mostly turned into love poetry which as funny as it is, I keep quite personal these days. 

But sometimes depression takes its toll and my own emotions seem so hard to even turn into something which I can stick into a story that they're just left to turn into a poem.

I just find myself hard, I find myself dealing with myself hard due to all the harassment I've had whilst growing up from people I cared and not and I just care about too many things and I've been losing a lot of people who I cared about simply due to their ignorance and I honestly do feel like when I scream about something like human rights, I honestly feel like no one can hear just like I've been told that I'm a shit who no one will ever care about and then I just get depressed all over again

because frankly I just want to live calmly as who I am and people who aren't facing any sort of discrimination don't get that and I end up feeling that I am worthless and that really gets to me

it gets to me that I can't change society and that I can't change people and when I do, I dismiss it because I've been told that I'm shit and it really clings onto me

sorry I haven't been in the brightest of moods and I've started writing another new story XD which I'm excited but I'm nervous to post so it should be up in the next few days and it has someone who I've never used in a story before and they were just far too fitting :D

Please tell me if you enjoyed it as I've been down and feel silenced

thank you

<3

Jamie